For most people a death brings pain and difficulties. Many thoughts flow through our minds – not only grief, pain and loss, but also feelings of gratefulness and happy memories. We often feel sorry that we did not say or do certain things, that we were inadequate, or that we said things that should have been left unsaid. Feelings such as anxiousness, anger, guilt, depression, relief or despondency are normal. All this confirms that it is a far reaching change in our life that occurs when one of our loved ones dies. We also react in different ways. Not everyone reacts with grief as mentioned above, but it is important to know that these are normal reactions.
Grief is life’s normal reaction to bereavement
Grief is not an illness that can be treated with simple medication. Grief is how we react when we say a final good-bye to someone who has been part of our life and our history. In the weeks following a death we experience grief in different ways. Some people need to be alone, whereas others want companionship and support from others. Family, friends or neighbours can be a good source of support at this time.
Many people find it difficult to share grief and bereavement with those close to them. It can often be easier to seek support from someone who deals with these matters in their daily work. In many churches priests, deacons or others offer consultations or bereavement groups. Organisations such as the Red Cross and Fransiskushjelpen (Catholic charitable organization) also offer similar support, as do individual municipalities. We mention these groups because we know that this kind of support can help many who grieve. It helps people to talk to others, either individually or in a group.